Los Expendejos The Movie

Here is my list for a movie based on the best latin action stars I would love to see in a movie.

Premise: The baddest Latinos on the planet unite to stop evil forces in Canada trying to take over the minds Latinos all over the world by using a mind control salsa. They must unite to put an end to the evil that is the Canadian Connection. Why is it the Canadians?.. because no one saw it coming

 1. The Leader: Antonio Banderas. AKA Latino Heat

Crafty, Cunning and seductive to the ladies. Unites the Group but also made sure that none were as caliente as him.

2. The Expert: Mario Almada. AKA The Mexican Chuck Norris

He has been through it all, knows how to use it all. Has been through it all and everyone respects and fears him. Mario Almada does not sleep... He waits. A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that this spot belongs to Mario Almada and if you park there, you will be handicapped. Mario Almada once had sex in a Laggon in Japan, an iguana accidentally stepped on Mario Almadas jizz, that iguana was forever known as Godzilla.

 

3. The muscle: Jorge Reynoso. AKA El Mero Mero

Muscle of the group, Skilled hand to hand combat and expert in firearms. Will break necks on site.

4. The Mecanic: Danny Trejo. AKA El Mecanico

Can make anything from a 64 impala. Favorite weapon... a Machete of course!

5. The Computer Guey. Luis De Alba. AKA Juan Camaney

Yo soy Juan Camaney, bailo tango, masco chicle, pego duro, tengo viejas de a montón, tu ru rú.

Computer expert mostly from browsing online porn. But can hack into any system.... except mac

6. The New Kid. Chingo Bling. AKA The Tamale Kingpin.

Street smart, connections to everything and everyone. Hustler. Chingo Blingo with the big tamarindo!

 

Get Ready for the:

Posted on August 30, 2010 .